We spent two weeks of that month in China, and we have been home for two weeks.
One of the things that has recently changed with China adoption is the number of post placement reports you have to do. A post placement report is sort of like a checkup…with your social worker.
With little M we had to do three of these. With baby J we have to do SIX.
The first one we did when little M came home was at six months. With the new rules, you have to do your first post placement at one month, so that is what we did this weekend.
A one-month post placement visit is a little silly…because really, how well do you know anyone after one month. Since the rule of doing a one month post placement is still so new, I think the questions are still similar to the six month post-placement, when you would know your child a little better. For instance, some of the questions have to do with how well your child is settling in, and what doctors you have seen, and what family and friends they have met. After being home for two weeks, your child probably has only begun to settle in, and you may not have had the chance to visit many doctors, and meet all of your friends and family.
Baby J has really only been home for two weeks…sometimes, it seems like he has been with us much longer, and he does seem to be settling into our family so well, but often something happens to remind us that we really don’t know our baby J that well after all.
This weekend baby J got sick…he started having labored breathing, and every breath he took rattled deep in his lungs. It happened very quickly, and we debated taking him to the emergency room. We called our on-call nurse, and she asked us a bunch of questions about his background. We didn’t know the answer to any of them. We don’t know if he’s done this before, if he’s allergic to anything, or if he was born prematurely. We haven’t even ever seen him sick before, so we have no idea if this is normal for him, or if maybe he could have asthma, since the next morning he woke up fine…
The longer baby J is with us, the more we will know about him. I remember when we were in the hospital, after little M’s surgery, the nurse asked us if our little girl looked like she was in pain. We had no idea because we had never seen her in pain. Now, I know all of her expressions by heart. I could tell you if she is in pain, or nervous, or scared…
One day, I will know baby J that well, too. And during one of our many post-placement visits, we will be able to give some great answers about our boy, and how well he is settling in. But for now, we’re still getting to know our precious baby J.