Thursday, July 12, 2012

Why I Do This...

I have been blogging for four years this month. At first, I just wanted to document our adoption journey, then that journey grew longer and longer, and I got bored and started crafting and decorating our house, and I started posting those crafts.
I documented all of our adoption steps, and all of the changes of this crazy journey that made us parents. And I'm glad I did...I love looking back and seeing where we were, and where we are now, and documenting my family's life seems worth the time it takes. Little M loves to look at all of her pictures on the blog, and I hope one day she will look back and enjoy reading about our journey.
Sometimes, I can't believe more than five people read this little blog, and sometimes I take a negative comment way too personally.


But I keep writing, and documenting and sharing. I like pictures, and stories about the people I love, and it feels important to me to have all of this written down.
It also feels important for me to be able to be transparent... to be open and honest, and share the things in my head and on my heart. It feels good to hear you say that you understand, that you don't think I'm crazy, and that I am doing ok as a parent.
If you know me, you know that I will tell you anything you want to know about me...and if you buy me a drink, I'll tell you even more!


I don't mind sharing these honest moments...
sharing things like how I sometimes lose patience with my child, and have to take a time out.
Or how I have thrown away little M's panties while we were shopping, because she had an accident, and I let her go panty-free the rest of the day.
I don't mind sharing, because I feel like many of you have been where I am, and you would understand...and if you don't, well, I don't know if we can be friends.
I share a lot, a LOT. But I don't share everything. I don't share every time I'm having a bad day, and I don't share every detail of our lives, because not only would that be boring, but sometimes I need to protect the privacy and feelings of my family. So I share what feels right to share, and I hold back the rest.

I've been so lucky to have so many supportive readers...you are pretty much the coolest people in the world. You make me feel like I'm ok! And I hope I make you feel like you're ok, also.

But ultimately, this blog is for my family. I am writing these words, and putting these photos here for them. I want my children to be able to look back, and remember what our lives were like. I want them to remember the trips we took, that we planned fun family things on the weekends, and that we made a big deal out of holidays. I want them to remember the traditions, like berry picking in the Summer, and the pumpkin patch in the Fall, like birthday celebrations, and beach trips, and walks to the park. I want them to remember the happy times, and sad times, and that we had struggles and successes. I want them to remember what it looked and felt like to be in our family, and that while it maybe wasn't always perfect, it was still always wonderful.


I want my family to be able to look back, to see that God was faithful, and that while life isn't always perfect, there is always joy to be found.

That is why I am doing this.



7 comments:

Forever Sisters said...

Even though I don't know you personally, I completly relate to you. As an adoptive parent of 2 children with special needs, I understand the good & the bad of international adoption.
I enjoy reading your blog & appreciate your honesty.
Keep it up!
PS: your're an excellent mom :)
Anne

Renate said...

I am so glad you are doing this for me! I love to see how sweet M is doing. Have been following since she came home. I don't comment often but I am here. Don't stop please.

R

ZoeB said...

Children, plural? Anyway, glad Miss M has her panties on in these pics!

I remember when my mom was a homemaker w/ 4 of us. You are no less sane than she was!!!!! Hmmmmm Take heart, you seem to be doing fine.

celine said...

I've thrown out more underwear than I care to mention. There is no shame in it! :)

Meg Hoffman said...

I love seeing what is happening with you all and you make me laugh out loud or even cry at times because I can see you saying everything you type and I know that it is true! M is so very lucky to have you as a mom and we are very happy to have you as our family.. remember we are secretly sisters in our new family haha <3 you all!

Hollis H. Notgrass said...

You are an amazing godly woman, and even though your blog is not "for me", i have shared specific posts with many friends and family members because your writing is so raw, so real, so truthful. You may not even realize how much so, but when you speak truths about our God and His role in what he does with your little family, you are speaking words of affirmation for us all. I forever love the post about when little M started to lover her daddy because it was such an echo of the heavenly Father's love for us, and even though that isn't why it was written, it spoke to me about something more when i needed it most. So, don't think that although what you write is for YOU and for your family, I am grateful to occasionally tune in and hear witness of the amazing (sometimes zany) things going in in the lives of others. I appreciate your blog, and I'm glad you write it! :)

Brad and Lauren Holmes said...

I love, love this post! You are a dear, dear friend and I appreciate your honestly more than you'll ever know. Also, this post in particular, encourages me to get back to my blogging. ;-)